The Agony and the Ecstasy of Dogs

27 Mar

Oh how we chuckled last night. Meg was lying peacefully next to me on the sofa, when suddenly she farted loudly, gave me a horrified look and went to lie on the floor instead. Disgusting mummy! How could you do such a thing? Um…

Hilarity ensued as a few minutes later, she did it again, still unwilling to believe that the sound could be coming from her. She ran away from the offensive noise, and, as it followed her, she ran faster, giving the impression that she was somehow jet-propelled.

We put her to bed after her normal night-time toilet trip, and thought nothing more of it.

Patrick had a really restless night owing to having been taken off the rugby pitch after a few minutes when a large man hit the side of his (Patrick’s) shin with his (large man’s) shoulder. Early, he announced that he was going to take himself to hospital, but that I should stay and have a lie in. He would let Meg out to pee and put her back in her cage until I got up.

Just settling back to snooze, I heard “Oh God! No!! Oh my God!!!!”

My heart sank. I leapt out of bed and came down to that breakfast table scene in Trainspotting. Meg had been unwell in the night and slept in it. In a rush of joy to be let out of the stink that her bed had become, she charged through the house, wagging and shaking with all her might. It looked like the shit had literally hit the fan.

I took the job of hosing her down outside, while Patrick started on the footprints on the cream carpet. I then took her for a walk to burn off some energy. I took the things that just couldn’t be saved to the dump while he started on the walls. The curtains are bagged up to be dry-cleaned and the washing machine has been going all morning.

All the while, Meg gave us her usual “what on earth are you up to? You humans do some odd things!” look. We haven’t been to the hospital yet, church has gone out the window and lunch for his brother-in-law’s birthday just wasn’t going to happen!

This one definitely goes on the “stuff we’ve dealt with and the baby can’t put us through” list. I hope…

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6 Responses to “The Agony and the Ecstasy of Dogs”

  1. greekmelie March 28, 2011 at 3:05 am #

    Oh my! That is a horror story! I really hope that the baby doesn’t put you through this! Is Meg all right now?

    • Becca March 28, 2011 at 6:20 am #

      Thank you! She’s fine – I think one of us must have accidentally dropped a chilli or something from dinner. She does vacuum up anything she finds! She was as happy as Larry only a few minutes later, which is usually a good sign.

  2. Peridot March 28, 2011 at 10:37 am #

    Ugh, sounds like she’s eaten something disgusting on a walk. They do that sometimes. Worse than the diarrhea is when they eat poo and then vomit it up – the singular mix of poo and vomit is absolutely stomach churning; I usually throw up myself. Ah, the joys of owning a labrador!

    • Becca March 28, 2011 at 11:19 am #

      Surprisingly, she’s more of a roller than an eater, unless it’s horse manure… In which case she’s like “mmm! All-you-can-eat buffet!”

  3. Summah March 31, 2011 at 7:09 pm #

    Oh no! Poor thing…but she’s so adorable! I love the color of her coat. And such a good mommy you are you taking care of her 🙂

    • Becca March 31, 2011 at 8:31 pm #

      I think she’s the most beautiful dog, but then I’m biased! I’m a bad mama today – took her for her rabies jab so she can travel with us the next time we drive to France or Spain. She is so unimpressed with me right now!

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